Drink:

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  • Whenever someone says they only watch the Super Bowl "for the commercials"
  • Whenever someone yells at the TV as though the refs can hear them
  • Somebody asks a very obvious question about the rules
  • Pre-gaming friend passes out before the game starts
  • Trailer for any superhero movie
  • Someone says "this year's commercials aren't as good as last year's"
  • Whenever you genuinely don't understand what a commercial is promoting
  • Someone denies a beer fart
  • "Who wants the last slice?"
  • Someone says "I'm just rooting for a good game"
  • Somebody points out that Tom Brady is a Trump supporter
  • "Patriots are cheating" / Deflategate reference
  • Someone mentions CTEs and the horrible cost of the sport we're all just trying to watch and really bringing everyone down, c'mon



Take a shot:

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  • Someone references Janet Jackson's nipple
  • Someone freaks out because they clearly have money on the game
  • Someone loudly announces what a high concept commercial is for because they watched all of the commercials on YouTube the day before
  • You have to call the delivery guy to see where your pizza is
  • Someone goes to the bathroom and someone else steals their seat.
  • Someone mentions kneeling
  • A couple goes into the hallway to have an argument, and everyone at the party is uncomfortably aware of it
  • Someone makes a "superb owl" joke like they just came up with it
  • "Someone wanna go on a beer run?"
  • "They should have gotten (insert some cool indie band no one's ever heard of) to do the half-time show instead of Justin Timberlake"
  • One person says they're just here to watch "This Is Us" after



Finish your drink:

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  • Whenever someone mockingly refers to it as "sportsball"
  • Someone drives home at half-time to poop
  • Someone actually tries the gross bean dip your creative friend brought
  • Someone decides that they're gonna call in sick to work tomorrow
  • Someone says they could be a kicker
  • One member of the arguing couple leaves midway through the game while the other stays but is awkwardly quiet, clearly pissed off, and texting nonstop
  • You get¬†really¬†into the post-game "This Is Us" episode despite having never seen the show before



Drink until you pass out:

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  • When the Patriots win, because it's 2018 and the world needs to remind you that life is unfair